Finally Found the Quiet

There is that saying, "The calm before the storm"; there is also the reverse which is the quiet that follows a storm.  We are in a time of quiet.  The seas have settled and our last planned activity is behind us.  A blissful two weeks of non crazy filled days is hours away.  Oh thank you God.  Not just for pushing us into this cozy corner, but for providing the blessings that were shared in the weeks past.

(The rocks of offerings that may have been rough to do, will come full circle on Easter Sunday; replaced by sweet rewards for deeds done with grace and humility)

Most of our time has been spent with family and dear friends.  I've made very little time for blogging; I have run out of juice for this space right now.  It's mostly due to the heavier obligations, one that is new and one that is growing, among my little family. 

(And they mocked Him, dressing him in the colors of a King and a crown of thorns)

I've voiced out some concern over on FB about one area of change, homeschooling has taken a new and challenging leading role.  Max has some learning issues (has since the beginning) that now require a lot of my time teaching one on one.  With home educating more than one child, teaching confirmation to the youth of our parish, still keeping up with house cleaning and the needs of the other family members (plus my own); I've just about pulled my hair out more than once.

Somehow though, it's all falling into place.  There is no room for the sloth in me to show it's side.  It always lurks for a way out though.  Thus, my anxiety on whether I'm using my time wisely or not.

Another place of focus lies with my FIL.  He hasn't had the greatest news in his fight with cancer lately.  It is by the grace of God, truly a miracle and blessing from Him alone that he is still with us.  Two years ago he was given months... stage 4 they said.  Go home and prepare to die was their advice.  It has been a borrowed time with him that has provided the branches so many blossoms have grown from.  This past week perhaps the best of all. 

Since he (my FIL) is a very private man, I've not shared too much; here or anywhere else.  Those that already know and have offered so many prayers... THANK YOU!  He is going strong and with God all things are possible.

(The countdown to Lent takes on a little different look each year, this one was from Lacy @ Catholic Icing.  We placed an area for special prayers and added a pocket for prayer cards on the bulletin too)

Is it no wonder that the feeling of failing something or someone is a constant nagging on my conscience. As if I'm failing this season of Lent, to grow in those virtues of patience, prudence, piety...

Crazy, I know.  I found myself questioning such little things; why didn't I offer my cup of coffee for Lent?  Feeling terrible that we have yet to attend daily Mass.  Asking myself if our rosaries or divine mercy prayers are really enough?

(Each Lenten season we put our prayers in a jar (offering the names of family and friends).  Every Sunday of Lent one child draws a name and that person(s) are prayed for specifically each day of that week.  We are, of course, praying daily for our Pope Benedict XVI!  It's a special time in our Church for sure)

 

Lucy thought, or thinks, her Mama is nuts.  She just about said it too, though not in those exact words.  But, she noticed my anxiety over it.  In her simple and direct way, the willingness to serve is a sacrifice, Mom!  Why are you trippin'?  She really didn't ask why I was trippin'.  Her grammar and English is near perfect, funny girl.  You want to get a reality check, go ask your teenager.  They have all the answers (hahaha).

So, I'm calmer now.  Happy to have the opportunity to refocus my priorities again.  Glad to be in this moment.  Hey, sometimes one needs the pot of life to be stirred up a bit.  My pot was definitely stirred. 

(Rose working on a letter to her Godparents; her special intention this week)

With God's grace, I hope to come out of this season a bit wiser and more grateful than I was before.  That alone makes me smile. 

"How can we complain when He Himself was considered 'as one struck by God and afflicted'."

(Isa. 53:4)

~ St. Therese of Lisieux

(Lent faith folder from Linda's Lapbooks for Catholics. The kids are working on this during Lent.  Except Lucy, who did this years ago when I first purchased it.)

Trust! Faith! Hope!

There are moments that take me back, in awe of God's love, his wisdom, his mercy.  We find that our trust has to be complete and without limitations.  But that's harder to do, sometimes to say.  Can I say that I totally TRUST.? That I and my family say;

"I give ALL this to you, my God.  Take it/this from me.  I am on my knees with my arms stretched out in total submission to you."

I can say this, yet there are so many moments that I don't.  That I fall back to old habits. 

Why am I rambling on?

Because our family, people we love/adore, are in place of crisis.  Crisis?

Well from the outside looking in, all this, this 'stuff', what's happending.  It is considered a crisis, suffering.  And yes, there is suffering. 

I've been reflecting on what my spiritual director just recently asked me.

"How do you handle the trials of life differently than others?" 

I place my trust and lay my hopes in Jesus.

The words just spurted out. In midst of troubles (I write the word loosely), there is the complete acknowledgement that there is GREATER suffering going on, much greater then ours.  We are fall into seasons of trials.  How then do we get by?

Okay, where am I going with this?

It involves a fire:

This past Tuesday, my SIL and her family lost their home, all their belongings, most if not all of their pictures, and precious memories; in a fire. 

In a matter of minutes the fire, smoke, and water took EVERYTHING.  Their eldest daughter, our goddaughter, is an accomplished artist and writer; her notebooks, her manuscripts.  Things she's been pouring her soul into...gone.

One of the younger kids began to to give her mom sweet little pieces of needle point.  Little scraps of cloth that she would take and sew a lovely note or a tiny picture...gone.

Another daughter, a savvy sewer, her creations.  Most of these items are probably gone. 

Gone are are ALL of their school curriculum and school work.  Think of how long it takes to find the books that work?  Years of collecting sentimental books.  Many Catholic ones. Yes, they are a homeschooling family.  Gone.

My SIL says, "But hey stuff, it's just that.... stuff." 

Still, the place they find themselves in is not easy; it's frustrating and they have a challenge ahead of them to regain 'normal'.  It'll be 4-6 months before they can return 'home'.  As a family with 7 children, the concept of 'home' has changed.  Even the baby feels it.

And yet still.

Buy the grace of God, no was injured!  Buy the grace of God, they will get through this.  We rejoice in this!

In an email update she just wrote:

"We have love, faith, and hope in God that nothing can take that joy from us. He has blessed us so far and above what we could ever ask, and we trust his hands will guide us through all this and we will be stronger by it."

Trust! Love! Faith! Hope!

 

It's what guides and comforts. 

 
In what's happening to them.  In still praying for my FIL, in his fight against cancer.  This week seemed especially difficult for him.  Praying for a brother of mine, oh the suffering he endures to escape his situation. 
 
All this, and more, looks like a crisis. 
And it is... to some extent.
 
But like my SIL stated, "We have love, faith, and hope in God."  And with this, there is lots of JOY! 
 
We have an abundancy of joy!
 
Rose will be making her First Holy Communion on Sunday! 
And she'll be turning 8!
Two sweet new babies will be baptized into the Church this weekend.
Family and friends are serving and giving of themselves in droves!
My little brood are healthy and sweet and still so innocent!
Their is love in my home!
 
Yep, God is SO good!!!!
 
So so good.
 

Would you please offer your prayers for my SIL and her family? 

For all the other families they are meeting in similar situations? 

Please continue to pray for my FIL

&

my brother.

 

~ Thank you ~

 

♥

May God reward you

♥

March for LIFE 2011

If you near would you please join us!

"The LA March is a ecumenical event that is brought to you by the Knights of Columbus, Van Nuys Council 3148. The purpose of the event is to raise awareness of the plight of the unborn and to raise funds that support pro-life causes in the San Fernando Valley."

~ The L.A March website

Our family participated several years ago, so I'm very excited to join the march once again.

This isn't a 'protest' kind of a march but a loving-educational event for everyone.  I remember leaving that corner moved and motivated.

This year's guest speakers include: Keynote, Bishop Gerald E. Wilkerson, Auxiliary Bishop of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Los Angeles, Dr. La Verne Tolbert, Former member on the Board of Directors of Planned Parenthood NYC and now an avid pro-life advocate, and Jeff White Co-founder of SURVIVORS and Operation Rescue West Coast.

If you are near on

March 17, 2011

JOIN THE MARCH!

Details can be found on the

Los Angeles March for Life

website

"America you are beautiful . . . and blessed . . . . The ultimate test of your greatness is the way you treat every human being, but especially the weakest and most defenseless. If you want equal justice for all and true freedom and lasting peace, then America, defend life." - Pope John Paul II

Finding love in the day

Did you know it was the feast of St. Valentine yesterday?  It kinda snuck up on me, rather like a cold.  Not that I don't enjoy the hearts, the reds and pinks, or the expression of love.  I totally do.  But, I hadn't prepared and I've been in a disconnected kind of place lately. 

Oh I'm not throwing a bah-hum-bug party, don't worry.  But celebrating lovely feast days and cool holidays is my kinda thing.  So, when I awoke to my kids making the heart shaped pancakes with beds made-chores done; when it's usually me raising them up from their sleep with the aroma of heavenly pancakes in some sort of heart shaped form (oh the violins are loud in the background), I knew I my head was in too many places and NOT at home.  

The breakfast was lovely and appreciated!  A momma needs some TLC too.  My visit to put steel on my teeth, and the thought of having to live with them for oh the next 2 years, was not as appreciated. Note, there will be less pictures of me on this blog for quite a while ;-).

Once I energized with a yummy green smoothie though, I gathered myself together.  The supplies were brought out, the computer became our ever loyal friend and we started crafting.

Max created

pencil holders using Lacy's down loadable cards!  Thank you Lacy for sharing!

Cecilia chose to express her love with some bling.

Several priceless jewels tucked away in her pouch for safe delivery.

Let Friendship Ring

Rose chose to write 3 very special cards

She decorated them as she wanted, writing a personal note to her recipients.

Lucy, as the big kid opted to use this image of St. Valentine

Making individually decorated Holy Cards to pass along to her cousins.

When the Lineman came home from work, he accepted my prompting to take the kids to deliver their love notes.  This would give me the time to cook, bake and decorate for a

St. Valentine's Dinner

The Lineman showed up with pretty white roses, several a bottle of wine, and my favorite dessert...FLAN...it was super good!

What started as a unprepared day,

ended exactly as it was meant too!

May God's unending love be forever appreciated! 

Day 2

I thought I'd pop in for a pep talk.  I really need one. 

As I mentioned on Monday or Tuesday, The Lineman and I planned on cleaning out and CLEARING out  our garage.  We are in the middle of some major work and It's been both humbling and embarrassing to say the least; we just have WAY TOO MUCH STUFF!

A lot of what we found were clothes I was saving for the next child.  We have two huge bins of pictures, a bin for books, too many bins of paper work and several bins of felt and fabric.  And this is just MY stuff, I  I was pretty overwhelmed over the amount of it.  Think of a 8ft x 15ft wall of boxes looming over you.  We knew that we couldn't put that beast back in our home.  The Lineman and I just repeated that over and over. 

Now, day 2!

The last few hours were spent going through just the clothes and party stuff I have. So far I have 4 large bags of clothes to give away and boxes upon boxes of other items; including books and curriculum. We are on a roll.

But the evidence of our lack of getting rid of stuff has really made me think. 

I know people who are very good at keeping their home clutter free. They are great at decluttering and keeping only the minimal of what they need. I think I'm just not one of those people. Sorry, I really try to be. Every season of Lent I declutter. Every 3-5 months I go through my children's clothes. Yet, the stuff builds up.  Honestly I know and love the concept of simple-clutter free living. I've seen it! Just not always in my home ;-).

I know my weaknesses though. Now the thing for me to build on is strength, maintenance and saying NO. The garage is our last frontier of the clutter monster.  We are armed with bags and will! 

Be gone clutter!  Be gone!!!

Whew!  Now, back to the beast.

Proceed with caution

This is going to be a straight out and honest run of the heart.  It's been quite a while that I've used this little blog to do what I'm about to do.  And I know as I type this that there is a 99% chance that I'll delete before I press 'post'.  But I really need to type-write-think out loud.

Have you ever had 'one' of those weekends where almost everything was off...or weird?  Not weird in the ha ha ha (funny) sense...but like you were in the middle of a very bad plot.  That was my weekend, in a nutshell.

I had a good dose of blessings, both in the ordinary and extraordinary kind.

Little people that I absolutely adore received a special sacrament.  Old friends were paid a visit and another new soul entered our Church through the sacrament of baptism.  My eldest daughter spent yet another day among the Carmelites and continues to grow towards becoming a wonderful faithful young lady.  We watched one of the most wonderful movies on the Mass that I have personally seen. 

It really was a great weekend, right?

But

Here goes...

There are things out there (I won't even name them) attacking.  Trying to distract our eyes from Him, our hearts even.  Plotting episodes to fill any available space with anger, doubt, envy, hurt...why do we fall into these traps?

There is a left over feeling of sadness from all this.  From the feelings that were hurt and the misunderstandings that occurred.  So sad that emotions got the best of some.  So unfortunate that in the midst of great joy we allow ourselves to get caught.  Do we even see this plot developing...do we see it coming at us like a out of control semi?

How to prepare for these battles? 

Staying closer to Him.  Especially during the hits.  Rely on prayer and those moments to be humbling quiet.  Allowing ourselves to hear Him.  To remember that it's NOT about us but about His will.  So if only I can remember to hold my tongue and open my ears more.  To stay away from the 'mere occasion of sin'.  That when a friend is hurt, or a loved one, and the mouth begins to run without thought...to RUN.  Then return to console and patiently listen.  Or just stay and listen (biting the tongue as a precaution).

Because it's not about me.

'If humble souls are contradicted, they remain calm; if they are calumniated, they suffer with patience; if they are little esteemed, neglected, or forgotten, they consider that their due; if they are weighed down with occupations, they perform them cheerfully.'

--St. Vincent de Paul

Dear little blog,

I haven't meant to neglect this space. 

But as always this time of year is just so super busy!

There are a few post in the making,

mostly about where I've been keeping myself.

But

I promise to be back soon.

I'll spend some time

putting several events

into words.

Blog about

planning the school year for my first 9th grader

and her siblings

planning for that major trip Hubby and I are taking

the growing of our summer crop

the down time forced upon us that started as a sad thing

and

quickly became a blessing

Oh, I have lots to say

:-)

My thoughts do wander off to think of how life is going for the many bloggers I've grown to admire and love

the yummy post

the soon arrival of a new babe

are there spots yet?

always a joy to visit

A need to visit often lately!

Until the time allows for me to return,

May God fill your days with Peace!

You know you're a homeschooler...

...when

the library no longer places your requested books on the hold shelf.  But instead, place the stack on a specially assigned spot on their desk...expecting my arrival at 'any' moment.

(I had to laugh when I saw it.  It took 3 kids and myself to carry them back to car the LOL)

How goes it?

I am overhauling lesson plans, beginning to look into Lucy's 9th grade year (what!), and trying to keep with the rhythm of our home that seems to have fallen from Heaven. 

It's been a really good school week. 

It's been a great prayer week. 

And all I did was; do less.

Could it be that simple?

Yep, I'm full proof of it.  With the exception of work that is being done on some property and a very sick relative in the hospital; we have been on a nice simpler roll. 

Now I need to figure out how to keep this nice turn of events with 3 kids in weekly orchestra and all kids starting baseball and softball two weeks from now.....

Oh dear!

The Days Before Christmas...

Well this is how our days are going.  Using this stuff as nourishment!  Yes, laugh if you will.  I can't get over it.  We has such plans but, if you know anything about me you'll know that it would take more than several bouts of this nasty little bug to shoot down my plans for the last week of Advent.  No sir, I was not about to throw in the towel.  It was a simple matter of adjusting ones plans.  Gotta check the sickos but I'll be back to post pictures from our Advent Tea.